Well today marks the first day of summer for me. Yeah "classes" are done with and there's no going back until the next semester. Of course I have finials so the victory of beating the school semester has yet to come.
I'm not saying final exams are a battle, but all students know there's a element of fighting. So the insomnia starts as I painfully write out the last report, finish off a portfolio, and study like hell.
Oh and to make things challenging... I seemed to have misplaced my glasses... So this all comes to me in the form of a blur!
~J out
Friday, April 27, 2007
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
The Third Sex
This week I've been fixated on the study of transgender. For a class of mine, we were to find something unique about gender in Asia and I picked (actually from my dad's suggestion) the phenomena of Transsexuals in Thailand, better known as Kathoey.
Transsexuality is a deep and complex subject and I do not fault anyone who finds it so complex that they avoid it all together. So far I've read three books and a dozen articles dealing with both Asian transsexuality and Western transsexuality and I feel even more ignorant then when I began... But for your educational value I will try to convey the basics or atleast synthesize what I've learned thus far.
The most complex, yet simple problem with the third sex is that there is no mono-lingual word like man, woman, boy, or girl that can describe the third sex. We've resorted to a plethora of singular binaries that just merge our dichotomous lingual vocabulary of gender. (i.e. man-woman, he-she, lady-boy, trans-sexual, etc. oh and 'it") This of course points to our consistent problem of trying to name "the other" or "not-man/woman."
Don't worry just yet!... the lack of a singular term may be because both normal heterosexuals, as well as, transsexuals (this being strictly Western/American society) feel that sexuality should be binary and that American transsexuals desire to be anatomically & socially feminine due to their psychological perception of themselves. Meaning that those who are transitioning sexuality to a female (or male) desire you to think they are either a man or woman, not an other.
So... the third sex calls for us to examine language, but language is more or less an extension of our culture. As Americans we naturally and force-ably ascribe gender categories as soon as we've sexed the fetus (aprx. in the 7th month). We reinforce gender by colors (blue/pink), clothes, jewelry, and how different genders speak: Language (notably pronunciations in Spanish & Japanese). The debate over gender generally falls to one question... "just who decides gender anyway?"
Some have said that it is naturally biology that makes us male or female. Specifically our sex organs or genitalia is all that's needed to concretely labeled in either group. This of course is problematic, because babies who are born hermaphrodites (having parts of both male and female genitalia) or babies who are born with defects or even special chromosomal syndromes like Klinefelter's Syndrome (KS) in boys or Turner Syndrome (TS) in girls become victims of hasty surgeries to make them "fit in" later in life.
Of course KS and TS are likely the exception and not the norm. The third sex comes from arguably somewhere deeper. Religions have poor answers in this arena, but generally we're taught that these people are weird and perhaps are products of a "sinful life." Scientists are no help either... Psychologists suggest something that happened in their childhood or perhaps the result of a hormonal imbalance at birth. Richard Totman, a social anthropologist who wrote the Third Sex, interviewed surgeons who perform sexual reassignment surgeries and they say that for most of their patients, the desire to be the opposite sex often spurs at a very young age... and perhaps developed sometime before birth.
Of course nothing has been set in concrete, we're dealing with humans after all and perhaps one may notice that humans just do not fit into all of our boxes. While perhaps our knowledge of third sex might be hotly contested (or non-existent) we should still tread lightly when passing judgment. I know that after pouring over story after story of each of these individual's past, I've realized that these are people too and progress with in this "non-purely-gay" and "certainly non-heterosexual" group may be just finding the right words to talk about who assigns gender and sexuality or what it is anyway.
On the other hand, our minds may be too corrupted to change. I know that after just minimal research I find myself questioning why I gender people in such a binary sense. We often I look at someone and say "yeah that's a boy" or "that's a girl" until I run into someone who could be either--at which time I'm baffled and think... "weird." Perhaps you do the same?
Telling these people who are like this to wear blue for boy or pink for girls just won't work. We need to find language and ultimately we just talk about it.
As for the Kathoey... my research carries on into the deep and complex world of Thailand's third sex. I suppose I am grateful to my Dad for suggesting this topic, because it opened my mind to a world that I had no clue about. Unfortunately this is likely too deep for him, because it's questioning preconceived notions of gender that are fragile and weird. That's OK... We all should look at how we definitively know that: That's a girl or that's a boy and I mean it outside what were taught. Is there a third sex? a fourth sex? a seventeenth sex? I'll leave that for you to decide for yourself... In the mean time you should be proud of who you are... maybe write "I proud to be a man", or "I'm proud to be a woman", or "I'm proud to be a ..." well you get the point...
~J out
Transsexuality is a deep and complex subject and I do not fault anyone who finds it so complex that they avoid it all together. So far I've read three books and a dozen articles dealing with both Asian transsexuality and Western transsexuality and I feel even more ignorant then when I began... But for your educational value I will try to convey the basics or atleast synthesize what I've learned thus far.
The most complex, yet simple problem with the third sex is that there is no mono-lingual word like man, woman, boy, or girl that can describe the third sex. We've resorted to a plethora of singular binaries that just merge our dichotomous lingual vocabulary of gender. (i.e. man-woman, he-she, lady-boy, trans-sexual, etc. oh and 'it") This of course points to our consistent problem of trying to name "the other" or "not-man/woman."
Don't worry just yet!... the lack of a singular term may be because both normal heterosexuals, as well as, transsexuals (this being strictly Western/American society) feel that sexuality should be binary and that American transsexuals desire to be anatomically & socially feminine due to their psychological perception of themselves. Meaning that those who are transitioning sexuality to a female (or male) desire you to think they are either a man or woman, not an other.
So... the third sex calls for us to examine language, but language is more or less an extension of our culture. As Americans we naturally and force-ably ascribe gender categories as soon as we've sexed the fetus (aprx. in the 7th month). We reinforce gender by colors (blue/pink), clothes, jewelry, and how different genders speak: Language (notably pronunciations in Spanish & Japanese). The debate over gender generally falls to one question... "just who decides gender anyway?"
Some have said that it is naturally biology that makes us male or female. Specifically our sex organs or genitalia is all that's needed to concretely labeled in either group. This of course is problematic, because babies who are born hermaphrodites (having parts of both male and female genitalia) or babies who are born with defects or even special chromosomal syndromes like Klinefelter's Syndrome (KS) in boys or Turner Syndrome (TS) in girls become victims of hasty surgeries to make them "fit in" later in life.
Of course KS and TS are likely the exception and not the norm. The third sex comes from arguably somewhere deeper. Religions have poor answers in this arena, but generally we're taught that these people are weird and perhaps are products of a "sinful life." Scientists are no help either... Psychologists suggest something that happened in their childhood or perhaps the result of a hormonal imbalance at birth. Richard Totman, a social anthropologist who wrote the Third Sex, interviewed surgeons who perform sexual reassignment surgeries and they say that for most of their patients, the desire to be the opposite sex often spurs at a very young age... and perhaps developed sometime before birth.
Of course nothing has been set in concrete, we're dealing with humans after all and perhaps one may notice that humans just do not fit into all of our boxes. While perhaps our knowledge of third sex might be hotly contested (or non-existent) we should still tread lightly when passing judgment. I know that after pouring over story after story of each of these individual's past, I've realized that these are people too and progress with in this "non-purely-gay" and "certainly non-heterosexual" group may be just finding the right words to talk about who assigns gender and sexuality or what it is anyway.
On the other hand, our minds may be too corrupted to change. I know that after just minimal research I find myself questioning why I gender people in such a binary sense. We often I look at someone and say "yeah that's a boy" or "that's a girl" until I run into someone who could be either--at which time I'm baffled and think... "weird." Perhaps you do the same?
Telling these people who are like this to wear blue for boy or pink for girls just won't work. We need to find language and ultimately we just talk about it.
As for the Kathoey... my research carries on into the deep and complex world of Thailand's third sex. I suppose I am grateful to my Dad for suggesting this topic, because it opened my mind to a world that I had no clue about. Unfortunately this is likely too deep for him, because it's questioning preconceived notions of gender that are fragile and weird. That's OK... We all should look at how we definitively know that: That's a girl or that's a boy and I mean it outside what were taught. Is there a third sex? a fourth sex? a seventeenth sex? I'll leave that for you to decide for yourself... In the mean time you should be proud of who you are... maybe write "I proud to be a man", or "I'm proud to be a woman", or "I'm proud to be a ..." well you get the point...
~J out
Ego over Real Strength under Brute Strength
Man desires respect from other men and it is the goal of man to keep his worth for as long as he lives. "Worth" in this respect, if that man is a blue collar working man, means perpetulating the myth that he is as strong as he was at 22. For intellectuals, its means perpetuating the myth that you are always smarter then 22 yearolds. This is tough because image is a facade that decays fast and requires lots of effort to maintain.
In this era... America is like a middle aged man looking back and trying to show the world that it is still as strong as it's always been. Our constitution shows a time when we were spry and energetic.
What is the reality? We are mortal men. We can deny our mortality, but it constantly tarnishes our 'outer man.' In truth, as we age we lose brute strength for valuable wisdom. Wisdom is real strength. For America, when we hear "the need for change" it points to the need to realize we've changed... The working man of 2007 is not the working man of 1907. Machines have taken the place of real brute labor and working environments now need to comply with OSHA.
What if we dropped our ego and let our guard down and admitted that real men are mortal? Would we dismiss men as weak and feeble or would we come to the truth that all men are mortal? Consequently, what would happen if we let companies compete to raise the standard of the homeless and poor? What if companies competed for the best education for our young ones or the health care of America's working class? Society would experience change... social change. By admitting you are mortal you admit that the policies of America 100 years ago really do not apply to today and that society could stand a reform.
We should promote the mortality of man... Young men should realize their destiny is getting old and management should realize that middle aged men are valuable assets not liabilities.
Overall we could stand a chance to reform democracy & capitalism...change the equation to ego under real strength over brute strength... Keep an eye on the past and two feet facing forward to the future~ when this happens~ the weak will be stronger then the strong!
In this era... America is like a middle aged man looking back and trying to show the world that it is still as strong as it's always been. Our constitution shows a time when we were spry and energetic.
What is the reality? We are mortal men. We can deny our mortality, but it constantly tarnishes our 'outer man.' In truth, as we age we lose brute strength for valuable wisdom. Wisdom is real strength. For America, when we hear "the need for change" it points to the need to realize we've changed... The working man of 2007 is not the working man of 1907. Machines have taken the place of real brute labor and working environments now need to comply with OSHA.
What if we dropped our ego and let our guard down and admitted that real men are mortal? Would we dismiss men as weak and feeble or would we come to the truth that all men are mortal? Consequently, what would happen if we let companies compete to raise the standard of the homeless and poor? What if companies competed for the best education for our young ones or the health care of America's working class? Society would experience change... social change. By admitting you are mortal you admit that the policies of America 100 years ago really do not apply to today and that society could stand a reform.
We should promote the mortality of man... Young men should realize their destiny is getting old and management should realize that middle aged men are valuable assets not liabilities.
Overall we could stand a chance to reform democracy & capitalism...change the equation to ego under real strength over brute strength... Keep an eye on the past and two feet facing forward to the future~ when this happens~ the weak will be stronger then the strong!
(This means letting the young guy pick up the paper boxes instead of trying to prove yer still a whipper-snapper!)
~J out
~J out
Monday, April 23, 2007
A Silver bullet or a silver gun?
Today the news reel is raving about what congress should do to fix gun laws,
The congress is raving to the media that, "there is no silver bullet."
That that term "silver bullet" is a unique term to America. It refers to the idea that there's no one solution to the amassing problem, but if we dive back into pop-cultural history we know it also refers to the Hollywood portrayal of the only way one kills an immortal (like a vampire). This of course begs the question right?
Is America's gun law problems, education problems, health care problems, etc... immortals? or like vampires? i.e. sucking the life blood out of the country or are these problems too big to tackle therefore being America's immortal problems?
Seems to be that if a Hollywood-based analogy works to describe our problems, then we should look to Hollywood for a solution. Underworld 1&2 told us that you just need a bigger gun with lots of silver bullets or that you need someone who was both problem and resistance (vampire & warewolf). In that movie the young man had no clue that he could survive 2 bites and had to educated as to what his destiny was.
That word educated, if anyone has taken international relations or have had to analyze the growing problems in the third world, you've heard education as being one 'silver bullet' to alleviate the world's problems. The idea has been, generally, if you educate the Africans on birth control you can curb the aids epidemic. Well why not bring that idea here?
The new quest has been for us to "prevent another Chou" how can we do that without educating people first on the existing laws or methods to protect yourself from Chou like wackos? In no way am I saying education is the silver bullet, but rather I'm saying that before we shoot up schools with problem-fixing silver bullets we should first education the shooter (perhaps someone whose been bit by both politics and problem)... whom ever that may be.
just a thought
~J out
The congress is raving to the media that, "there is no silver bullet."
That that term "silver bullet" is a unique term to America. It refers to the idea that there's no one solution to the amassing problem, but if we dive back into pop-cultural history we know it also refers to the Hollywood portrayal of the only way one kills an immortal (like a vampire). This of course begs the question right?
Is America's gun law problems, education problems, health care problems, etc... immortals? or like vampires? i.e. sucking the life blood out of the country or are these problems too big to tackle therefore being America's immortal problems?
Seems to be that if a Hollywood-based analogy works to describe our problems, then we should look to Hollywood for a solution. Underworld 1&2 told us that you just need a bigger gun with lots of silver bullets or that you need someone who was both problem and resistance (vampire & warewolf). In that movie the young man had no clue that he could survive 2 bites and had to educated as to what his destiny was.
That word educated, if anyone has taken international relations or have had to analyze the growing problems in the third world, you've heard education as being one 'silver bullet' to alleviate the world's problems. The idea has been, generally, if you educate the Africans on birth control you can curb the aids epidemic. Well why not bring that idea here?
The new quest has been for us to "prevent another Chou" how can we do that without educating people first on the existing laws or methods to protect yourself from Chou like wackos? In no way am I saying education is the silver bullet, but rather I'm saying that before we shoot up schools with problem-fixing silver bullets we should first education the shooter (perhaps someone whose been bit by both politics and problem)... whom ever that may be.
just a thought
~J out
Friday, April 20, 2007
4.20 y'all
Today is April 20th, respectfully Uncle Adolf's Birthday... really that's all I'm going to say about that.
The paper got done last night and I'm not totally sure I *want* to turn it in, but I got no choice. So here goes nothing, in the box it goes and then I'll forget about it. Sometimes you got a paper that's your baby and you just can't let it go. I mean you worry about forgetting a period or misspelling a word, etc. Maybe the next set of papers (what I'm calling "The Second Wave") will be like that... but I'm not backing down, because as the Crunch post suggested deadlines wait for no man.
Next week, "the second wave" will be more dog & pony-ish with presentations and such. I can manage presentations no problem it seems like mostly the actual sitting down and typing. They call this in grown-up circles "laziness" and well regrettably I'll have to agree.
After this weeks end... one more official week & weekend is left to type-like-the-wind. Make those points and try like hell to say something.
Whew... Ok... now that that's out there.. I feel mo~betta.
Peace out and stay groovy today in-da-SUN!
~J out
The paper got done last night and I'm not totally sure I *want* to turn it in, but I got no choice. So here goes nothing, in the box it goes and then I'll forget about it. Sometimes you got a paper that's your baby and you just can't let it go. I mean you worry about forgetting a period or misspelling a word, etc. Maybe the next set of papers (what I'm calling "The Second Wave") will be like that... but I'm not backing down, because as the Crunch post suggested deadlines wait for no man.
Next week, "the second wave" will be more dog & pony-ish with presentations and such. I can manage presentations no problem it seems like mostly the actual sitting down and typing. They call this in grown-up circles "laziness" and well regrettably I'll have to agree.
After this weeks end... one more official week & weekend is left to type-like-the-wind. Make those points and try like hell to say something.
Whew... Ok... now that that's out there.. I feel mo~betta.
Peace out and stay groovy today in-da-SUN!
~J out
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Just who is in control?
Given the current news cycle it's apparent that YOU ARE NOT IN CONTROL.
that might be a shocker and perhaps you should hear it again YOU ARE NOT IN CONTROL. Of course that doesn't add an ounce to your perception of safety or security, but it's true. Who is in control just might really not be in control, but those who we *think* are in control feel that if they relinquish the reality that they can't do anything then society will realize that WE LIVE IN A CRAAAAZY WORLD! Guess what... yep we live in a crazy world.
What are we not in control of?
that might be a shocker and perhaps you should hear it again YOU ARE NOT IN CONTROL. Of course that doesn't add an ounce to your perception of safety or security, but it's true. Who is in control just might really not be in control, but those who we *think* are in control feel that if they relinquish the reality that they can't do anything then society will realize that WE LIVE IN A CRAAAAZY WORLD! Guess what... yep we live in a crazy world.
What are we not in control of?
- The Iraqis
- Our campus's security
- Women's bodies after the 2nd trimester
and so much more... like crazy teenagers on the freeway.
So is it finally time to take the power back as Rage Against the Machine told us? Maybe we're not realizing something. If anyone watches Planet Earth on Discovery, you might have seen the DOW Commercial that tells us that we're often missing the human element.
Ahhh the Human Element "nothing more fundamental, nothing more elemental." In this weeks events we've seen in Iraq how fundamental the Human element is, while in Virginia we see how elemental life is (when it's taken from us).
Control might just be something we comfort ourselves with... even if it's not true. That doesn't mean we can't make the right choices. If we can get over how crazy other people really are, we might find the little craziness in ourselves.
What we can do help ourselves from becoming Chou or these fundamental Iraqi terrorists is to laugh at our mistakes and our quirkiness. Those who remembered Chou said that he never laughed or engaged in conversation.
Perhaps we can't single-handily change the world to our liking (duh), but we can change ourselves and how we think and react...remember,
the truth is out there
~J out
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
C.RRRRUNCH!
Surfers in Malibu dream of endless summers,
Hikers in the Rocky Mountains dream of warm, mosquitoes-less, fall days,
Students dream of a once week extension on their reports...
er... what was that?
Yeah this is crunch time... The last official week and a half where fingers fly faster across black keyboards then Bruce Lee can throw fists of fury. This is the time where teacher's wait in anticipation for their anguished students to pop out something prolific in the span of a couple of days. Whether or not it's possible doesn't matter, what matters is that you turn in 10 pages of black ink, double-spaced, 1" margins, in either Times New Roman (or for real procrastinator... Arial)
For me my papers are spanned out over two weeks... This week I'm busting my but to write 10 pages for one class, of which last night I realized that there was no way to move forward without modding my original thesis. Yeah... dumb move I'm sure, but when I re-read the thing, it looked like a straight up editorial. In plain English.. you can't cite your own theory. So hopefully with this new thesis (which I'm trying to incorporate the old thesis to save work already done) I'll get something that makes since and is "with-in range" of a B.
Then... this weekend will be hell writing the paper for my gender class. "Sexuality in Thailand" will be the header, but what to say? I've narrowed down everything to two sources. Hopefully that will be enough to state something worth reading.
I'm definitely ready for summer, but first I have to survive the bombardment of school work.
~J out
Hikers in the Rocky Mountains dream of warm, mosquitoes-less, fall days,
Students dream of a once week extension on their reports...
er... what was that?
Yeah this is crunch time... The last official week and a half where fingers fly faster across black keyboards then Bruce Lee can throw fists of fury. This is the time where teacher's wait in anticipation for their anguished students to pop out something prolific in the span of a couple of days. Whether or not it's possible doesn't matter, what matters is that you turn in 10 pages of black ink, double-spaced, 1" margins, in either Times New Roman (or for real procrastinator... Arial)
For me my papers are spanned out over two weeks... This week I'm busting my but to write 10 pages for one class, of which last night I realized that there was no way to move forward without modding my original thesis. Yeah... dumb move I'm sure, but when I re-read the thing, it looked like a straight up editorial. In plain English.. you can't cite your own theory. So hopefully with this new thesis (which I'm trying to incorporate the old thesis to save work already done) I'll get something that makes since and is "with-in range" of a B.
Then... this weekend will be hell writing the paper for my gender class. "Sexuality in Thailand" will be the header, but what to say? I've narrowed down everything to two sources. Hopefully that will be enough to state something worth reading.
I'm definitely ready for summer, but first I have to survive the bombardment of school work.
~J out
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
Something to listen for
The recent shootings and death of 32 (33 including the gunman) is, with out a doubt, extremely disturbing for anyone who goes to school and perhaps even knows someone who has come from S.Korea or knows a foreigner who is staying here (as the gunman was Identified as a S. Korean).
In order to be extremely careful here, I wouldn't want to interject politics or any of the sort... and honestly neither should anyone else because we really don't know why the gunman did what he did. Therefore it would be my hope that neither you, me, nor the press prematurely assign blame on any one thing or any one person. What I mean is that it would easy to say that:
So for today I would suggest everyone in our higher education system to smile at somebody, give somebody a compliment, or generally try to be nice today... do it either in respect to the people from Virgina Tech. or for yourself.
~J out
In order to be extremely careful here, I wouldn't want to interject politics or any of the sort... and honestly neither should anyone else because we really don't know why the gunman did what he did. Therefore it would be my hope that neither you, me, nor the press prematurely assign blame on any one thing or any one person. What I mean is that it would easy to say that:
- (b/c he's South Korean) video games played a roll (as Jack Johnson would have us believe) or that,
- having a gun or coming from somewhere without guns to somewhere guns and going nuts with it had anything to do with murders.
- Or that perhaps his girlfriend had anything to influence him or totally enrage him.
So for today I would suggest everyone in our higher education system to smile at somebody, give somebody a compliment, or generally try to be nice today... do it either in respect to the people from Virgina Tech. or for yourself.
~J out
Monday, April 16, 2007
remember to laugh!
I am a human and so are you
What that means is that our lives are never perfect little boxes and nor should they be. I'm talking about the little wrinkles that make life what it is... imperfect.
Like expected deadlines are deadly in that they make the 8 hour sleeping quota a joke for us college students. All last night I was writing about the Bangladeshi war and then like a changing channels on a radio, switched to gender in India...
pages... the obsession over the amount of pages has me in a fury to make a prolific discovery fit between the 10-11 page requirement. Of course I can easily make a convincing argument in 8 pages and save the paper, but there's something to that 10 pages that make teachers think that their students will push themselves. What's the reality?
We push ourselves to an unspoken insanity by staying up late, not thinking clearly, and fragmenting our sentences like hell. We critically think about wars and gender rather then think about food so our bodies starve (not for knowledge) but for steak & baked potatoes.(mmmm)
To top all that, my clutch has finally passed on. Inching at barely 25-30 mph to the clutch doctors my car was sending me screams to help it. So this morning after a quick revision of another paper, I drove the ole subbie to the clutch doctors in hopes of a miracle. This left me with "bucky" my dad's jeep to drive to school and to work. After getting to school (which of course Dad drove) he let me use his jeep to head off to class and eventually to work. Now the concert of the day will be interesting. The plan is after I get the call (estimated at noon today) that my car is done I'll relay that message to Dad who will notify my Mom to pay for it after she gets off work @ 4pm and picks up the key. My job will be to pick Dad up @ 6ish (when I get off work) and take him home where hopefully Mom will be there with the key and both Dad and I can pick the car up at our leisure. Well that's the plan... but "actual results may vary" because as I told you in the beginning of this post...
I am a human and so are you
~J out
What that means is that our lives are never perfect little boxes and nor should they be. I'm talking about the little wrinkles that make life what it is... imperfect.
Like expected deadlines are deadly in that they make the 8 hour sleeping quota a joke for us college students. All last night I was writing about the Bangladeshi war and then like a changing channels on a radio, switched to gender in India...
pages... the obsession over the amount of pages has me in a fury to make a prolific discovery fit between the 10-11 page requirement. Of course I can easily make a convincing argument in 8 pages and save the paper, but there's something to that 10 pages that make teachers think that their students will push themselves. What's the reality?
We push ourselves to an unspoken insanity by staying up late, not thinking clearly, and fragmenting our sentences like hell. We critically think about wars and gender rather then think about food so our bodies starve (not for knowledge) but for steak & baked potatoes.(mmmm)
To top all that, my clutch has finally passed on. Inching at barely 25-30 mph to the clutch doctors my car was sending me screams to help it. So this morning after a quick revision of another paper, I drove the ole subbie to the clutch doctors in hopes of a miracle. This left me with "bucky" my dad's jeep to drive to school and to work. After getting to school (which of course Dad drove) he let me use his jeep to head off to class and eventually to work. Now the concert of the day will be interesting. The plan is after I get the call (estimated at noon today) that my car is done I'll relay that message to Dad who will notify my Mom to pay for it after she gets off work @ 4pm and picks up the key. My job will be to pick Dad up @ 6ish (when I get off work) and take him home where hopefully Mom will be there with the key and both Dad and I can pick the car up at our leisure. Well that's the plan... but "actual results may vary" because as I told you in the beginning of this post...
I am a human and so are you
~J out
Friday, April 13, 2007
Slow but steady as she goes!
My car is a work horse. It takes me nearly everyday to work & school. It doesn't complain, whine, or moan. It just does its job, but recently the clutch has been slipping and my car is slowly but surely going to just not move.
Today proved most difficult as I trudged up the hill on US26 @ barely 40mph. Downhill is fine, but the car gets warm as you go uphill. So you say "just replace the clutch" well that is always more difficult then it sounds. No magic wand or fancy do-dad will reduce what must be done. There's methods to the madness, but they're all laborious and tedious as hell.
I thought this weekend I would put in my order for a nice 19" wide screen monitor for my new computer. Something big, something nice, something to write up all those papers that are due at the end of the month...but priorities are priorities. Chances are I might be working on my car over working on reports. I hope in the cosmos of things, this gives a small excuse for procrastinating... maybe not. But then again most reports can get spit out pretty quickly nowadays (after some serious wikipedia-ing... shhhh!).
The challenge now will be getting home and then doing some "Installing-a-new-clutch" research.
~J out
Today proved most difficult as I trudged up the hill on US26 @ barely 40mph. Downhill is fine, but the car gets warm as you go uphill. So you say "just replace the clutch" well that is always more difficult then it sounds. No magic wand or fancy do-dad will reduce what must be done. There's methods to the madness, but they're all laborious and tedious as hell.
I thought this weekend I would put in my order for a nice 19" wide screen monitor for my new computer. Something big, something nice, something to write up all those papers that are due at the end of the month...but priorities are priorities. Chances are I might be working on my car over working on reports. I hope in the cosmos of things, this gives a small excuse for procrastinating... maybe not. But then again most reports can get spit out pretty quickly nowadays (after some serious wikipedia-ing... shhhh!).
The challenge now will be getting home and then doing some "Installing-a-new-clutch" research.
~J out
Thursday, April 12, 2007
As if...
Perhaps it was the karma of yesterday's post that made what seemed like impossible... possible. Like the plan suggested I went through the chain of events by leaving the humdrum of work life to entering the stop-and-go zombies of commuters migrating like cattle back to their pigeon holes. After an hour of stop & go, loud music, and blasting cold air to keep my alive.. I made it home. It was no refuge, however, upon entering the house a cellphone bill was thrust at me like a dagger. $111 for last month's cellphone use. I looked through the phone numbers (all between me and my girlfriend) and asked politely "how much do I gotta pay you?" the drama exploded from there resulting in me eventually pulling down the earth flag & American flag outta the wind or at least that was the reason I gave to do it. In truth, it was me finally giving up and declaring defeat. I had nothing left to fight for that day... I was done.
I quietly ate my dinner and watched as the black caucus ripped apart another white shock jock... I didn't have any energy to say that they that in my opinion they should first examine what's on UPN 49 with all their black television shows, before they crucify another white guy on "multi-cultural issues" (read what should be called bi-cultural issues).
It wasn't long before my body quit and demanded that I rest. I slowly trudged to the refuge of my room with the lights off and collapsed in a heap on the bed. For about a solid hour I slept comfortably until Dad came rushing in asking for a copy of a DVD of his. Well copy a DVD? No prob. I awoke parts of my body so that I could function enough to get this small task out of the way, but technology was against me. My computer spat out the disks I fed it and the software popped up error messages like a little kid who refused to eat his veggies. I was flustered, tired, and didn't want to fight it. The deadline was the next morning @ 8 bells (8am) so after 2 1/2 hours of fighting I just copied the DVD's to my hard drive and went to bed at (ironically) 12:30pm roughly an half hour from the previous nights...
once again *sigh* life must love it's subtle lectures.
~J out
I quietly ate my dinner and watched as the black caucus ripped apart another white shock jock... I didn't have any energy to say that they that in my opinion they should first examine what's on UPN 49 with all their black television shows, before they crucify another white guy on "multi-cultural issues" (read what should be called bi-cultural issues).
It wasn't long before my body quit and demanded that I rest. I slowly trudged to the refuge of my room with the lights off and collapsed in a heap on the bed. For about a solid hour I slept comfortably until Dad came rushing in asking for a copy of a DVD of his. Well copy a DVD? No prob. I awoke parts of my body so that I could function enough to get this small task out of the way, but technology was against me. My computer spat out the disks I fed it and the software popped up error messages like a little kid who refused to eat his veggies. I was flustered, tired, and didn't want to fight it. The deadline was the next morning @ 8 bells (8am) so after 2 1/2 hours of fighting I just copied the DVD's to my hard drive and went to bed at (ironically) 12:30pm roughly an half hour from the previous nights...
once again *sigh* life must love it's subtle lectures.
~J out
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Tired as heck!
Perhaps the long nights and meetings has put my head into a daze. All day I've been nodding off just to wake myself up again and then get that rush of embarrassment. The answer would obviously be to get some more sleep or atleast go to bed earlier. However... that is easier then reality. The chain of events from leaving my cubicle here at work to getting to my bed is a long chain reaction that has a big possibility of just repeting yesterday's ordeal.
Where did nap time go? I remember back to a time in pre-school where they'd provided a crucial time for us young'ns to sleep... But don't think that now that I'm 22, I have some fantastic stamina!
Oh but I suppose the pain and suffering is just life telling me
"hey fool! Liv'n ain't no fairy ride... you's gotta EARN tat feel good sheeet!"
*sigh*
~J
Where did nap time go? I remember back to a time in pre-school where they'd provided a crucial time for us young'ns to sleep... But don't think that now that I'm 22, I have some fantastic stamina!
Oh but I suppose the pain and suffering is just life telling me
"hey fool! Liv'n ain't no fairy ride... you's gotta EARN tat feel good sheeet!"
*sigh*
~J
Monday, April 09, 2007
No Post?
I can't excuse myself from not posting, but the agony of not has forced me (with limited time) to post this...
Tonight at LC will be an International Symposium that I'm very excited about. However, while this will no doubt be full of exciting and interesting ideas about Iraq, I should be researching and typing out papers that will soon be due.
I appologize if the post slowly come out. Soon finals will be over and I'll be free do lots of things like design my own website. Yes... I've been diligently researching between breaks on how to make not just a cheezy website from tripod or some web-based thing, but a real one. On top of all that is registering and stuff for next year. Oh and did I mention that I work? Yeah... busy busy 'eh? Sometimes it drives me mad.
Well I'll try to take notes and given the next opportunity I'll try to convey what the speakers tried to argue.
~J out
Tonight at LC will be an International Symposium that I'm very excited about. However, while this will no doubt be full of exciting and interesting ideas about Iraq, I should be researching and typing out papers that will soon be due.
I appologize if the post slowly come out. Soon finals will be over and I'll be free do lots of things like design my own website. Yes... I've been diligently researching between breaks on how to make not just a cheezy website from tripod or some web-based thing, but a real one. On top of all that is registering and stuff for next year. Oh and did I mention that I work? Yeah... busy busy 'eh? Sometimes it drives me mad.
Well I'll try to take notes and given the next opportunity I'll try to convey what the speakers tried to argue.
~J out
Thursday, April 05, 2007
Alternative fuels and Taiwan
This is what I've talked about today in discussions and debates. Oh what a day. Not that much was discussed... since the sun is out not much will be talked about anywhere I guess.
Oh how the sun makes the problems go away...
atleast for now
~J
Oh how the sun makes the problems go away...
atleast for now
~J
Monday, April 02, 2007
back from sping break
I'm back to the normal schedule now which means class -> (then) work.
Coming back or at least driving to school has given me an insight that is purely obvious, but not often appreciated.
Coming back to school and being in this 'intellectual atmosphere' gives me some regret over what I should have done over spring break. There in lies the problem 'eh? If I were working on paper outlines and research then it wouldn't be a break, but that flies like brick in air. The feeling of guilt over not doing what I should have and the anxiety of having to do what I must do (write papers, research, etc etc.) just builds up for overly stressed and vulnerable students.
It's almost inherent in humans to utilize 'so called break time' for it's original purpose. However, here I am stressing over what I must do in the next month. Teachers should recognize the plight of the student and devise a way to under stress us. I.e. it would be great if they could compound the guilt of not working on the papers one day and then the next let us run to the library and write up outlines and stuff... i.e. give us a break after THE BREAK.
I'm confident I'll work it out.. and... if all fails just to remember that after the first week of May it'll be over regardless. (unless I do summer sch.)
Btw.. blip with the last computer config. (it didn't boot up) so I switched the Mobo and now it works and runs really fast! :)
Good luck to Tink whose starting spring quarter.. here's the best of luck. (I got roughly a month left!)
~J out
Coming back or at least driving to school has given me an insight that is purely obvious, but not often appreciated.
Coming back to school and being in this 'intellectual atmosphere' gives me some regret over what I should have done over spring break. There in lies the problem 'eh? If I were working on paper outlines and research then it wouldn't be a break, but that flies like brick in air. The feeling of guilt over not doing what I should have and the anxiety of having to do what I must do (write papers, research, etc etc.) just builds up for overly stressed and vulnerable students.
It's almost inherent in humans to utilize 'so called break time' for it's original purpose. However, here I am stressing over what I must do in the next month. Teachers should recognize the plight of the student and devise a way to under stress us. I.e. it would be great if they could compound the guilt of not working on the papers one day and then the next let us run to the library and write up outlines and stuff... i.e. give us a break after THE BREAK.
I'm confident I'll work it out.. and... if all fails just to remember that after the first week of May it'll be over regardless. (unless I do summer sch.)
Btw.. blip with the last computer config. (it didn't boot up) so I switched the Mobo and now it works and runs really fast! :)
Good luck to Tink whose starting spring quarter.. here's the best of luck. (I got roughly a month left!)
~J out
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