Oof. everything, from the macro down to the micro, is colliding like a massive meteor upon my nicely dyed blonde head.
I'm going to say it's cyclical and that it's likely that 60% of it was my own fault, 20% was others (and objects like my car) deciding this was the best time of year to throw down, 10% of it is everyone's hero Murphy with his laws of probability, 5% of it is this season/weather/transition, 3% of it is coincidence that it all happened these last two weeks, and the last 2% is due to other miscellaneous causes that I don't understand or know about.
However it's likely that 100% of this funk is due to the big man upstairs who is trying to tell me something like what the 80's Band Cinderella said in their 1988 hit, "don't know what you got till its gone~" (but it's not like I know the 80's or anything =P).
~J
Monday, October 29, 2007
Sunday, October 28, 2007
The Source of my Bummer
I think I've landed on the source of my recent strings of bummers. I'm somewhat the antithesis of my surroundings. A relatively independent person who just gets caught up the drama of living so when events shoot off everywhere I'm prone to react to them. The recent events of my life have really spun my head around. When my head gets full of a bunch of bummers and stressful situations my attitude slips and you get this version of Josh that's kinda melodramatic. Luckily, I have spotted the events that has caused this chain of bummers and with some careful planning I know I can make all my negatives positives.
So let me list a couple so that we're on the same page. Things on my mind and agenda list are:
On top of the plan I need a means of communication to broadcast just what Josh is up to. So while the plan is in the works and this blog still serves to broadcast my mind's thoughts.. I have a message:
"I want to first apologize if I have been unresponsive to you or have made you feel that I am uninterested with you. As you can tell this is most definitely not the case, I just have a lot to do. I care about each and everyone of you as though you were all priority one in my life. However, serving in the interests of getting things done and being progressive I would like you to support me as I 'get things done.' You can know, deep inside, that I love each and everyone of you, but I think it would be good if I spent some time on getting my life in order. This isn't me giving up on you or shutting off all lines of communication to you, indeed it would be great if you would keep in touch daily or semi-daily. Keeping all the balls in the air has been tough lately, and I rather do not like this time of season since everything seems to converge at this juncture in the year. For the time being I'm just going to putt away at everything that I need to complete. If you are on my list then rest assure you'll get my full attention when I get to the required task you assigned. Likewise my request to those who do support me is that you refrain from making offers that would otherwise sidetrack me. Soon all will be finished and I'll be able to continue running off doing things with all of you at anytime, but for now it would nice to manage my time for a little bit to really get things done.
You all are loved by me, and I hope you don't take this as a sign that I'm just bundling up and closing the door. Feel free to drop me a line or email or IM, I will get back to you as soon as I can.
Thank you for all your understanding, rest assure that when my tasks are with in manageable parameters I'll notify all of you via this blog.
*whew.. time to take a power nap, then wake up and get some things done! heh heh~
~J out
So let me list a couple so that we're on the same page. Things on my mind and agenda list are:
- The year long 35-40 Page Thesis Report Class
- The fact that it is a year long when it really doesn't have to be
- The Small 2 page and 6 page summaries and drafts (that make sense, but feel mundane and unnecessary)
- Having to focus my topic down to the micro level, but when asked on the streets "what's your thesis on?" not having a sufficient short answer. (e.g. you just want to tell the guy, "look how should I know I'm just started research'n :P
- More School
- One last final class that has with it its own little agenda and demands
- The fact that I need this class to graduate, but the material is stuff I've already studied, wrote papers on, and generally wished that I could just not show up to class and, in its place, hand in reading reviews and discussion papers to make up for no attendance.
- Work
- Progress mostly, making sure that the duties assigned to me are getting done.
- Keeping on task and staying focused
- Not getting burned out and rejecting thoughts of leaving
- Trying to maintain myself
- Business life
- Trying to keep both these balls in the air while remaining sane
- Personal Life
- Trying to take care of myself
- Trying to be original and unique, but also inventive and creative
- Trying to keep this blog alive since it is my only outlet at times #@_@#
- Organization and prosperity (don't ask)
- I.e Keeping the room, clothes, and body tidy and clean
- Trying not to ignore or lose any connections with the people I need to connect with, because the loss of these connections would redefine my life by school progress and work and I don't want either of them to define who I am (would you?).
- Phone bill, Insurance, Gas Bill, The Car (and the lingering doom of breaking down on me sometime)
- Other
- A Christmas vacation that I promised I would take Tink on this year.
On top of the plan I need a means of communication to broadcast just what Josh is up to. So while the plan is in the works and this blog still serves to broadcast my mind's thoughts.. I have a message:
"I want to first apologize if I have been unresponsive to you or have made you feel that I am uninterested with you. As you can tell this is most definitely not the case, I just have a lot to do. I care about each and everyone of you as though you were all priority one in my life. However, serving in the interests of getting things done and being progressive I would like you to support me as I 'get things done.' You can know, deep inside, that I love each and everyone of you, but I think it would be good if I spent some time on getting my life in order. This isn't me giving up on you or shutting off all lines of communication to you, indeed it would be great if you would keep in touch daily or semi-daily. Keeping all the balls in the air has been tough lately, and I rather do not like this time of season since everything seems to converge at this juncture in the year. For the time being I'm just going to putt away at everything that I need to complete. If you are on my list then rest assure you'll get my full attention when I get to the required task you assigned. Likewise my request to those who do support me is that you refrain from making offers that would otherwise sidetrack me. Soon all will be finished and I'll be able to continue running off doing things with all of you at anytime, but for now it would nice to manage my time for a little bit to really get things done.
You all are loved by me, and I hope you don't take this as a sign that I'm just bundling up and closing the door. Feel free to drop me a line or email or IM, I will get back to you as soon as I can.
Thank you for all your understanding, rest assure that when my tasks are with in manageable parameters I'll notify all of you via this blog.
*whew.. time to take a power nap, then wake up and get some things done! heh heh~
~J out
Friday, October 26, 2007
Sunday, October 21, 2007
two months till 23
Wow I'll be 23 years old in two months. Guess that makes me older, but my 23rd year will be a challenge.. a move towards responsibility, choices, and all else that happens after I shake the sands of 'going to school all my life' reality.
There's still a whole lot to do. My last class, thesis, work, and such.
This Sunday, however, I'd like to put forward a thought for you all to digest...
The other day I put forward a very personal perspective on 'the other' concept. Lately I've been thinking that I made generalizations about you and how you think about the other. Our reality today is that the world is very open and that a majority of us know issues outside of our immediate surroundings... and additionally, some of us actually care passionately about issues that do not immediately affect us. Take the matters of Sudan-- A country just under Egypt, whose environment is just as hard as fighting for survival, has come to the forefront of many of our minds. What happens there and what actions the government of Sudan make on its people effects how we behave here, even though a raid on the Sudanese isn't a raid on us physically. It wasn't long ago that Africa was just a continent in our minds. It was a whole, undivided, and issues (some of us thought) were universal issues. Take the generalization of Africa's environment, one could ask a person in 1940 (before the African campaign in WWII) about Africa's environment and they might tell you (again a generalization perhaps) that all of Africa is a desert. We know now (as pop culture in fact) that the Congo is mostly jungle, that South Africa is actually more towards the south pole and that effects cooler weather there, and that Libia has more of a Mediterranean feel. This example shows our globalized view (through education) and proves that our view of 'the other' isn't what it was a decade ago.
Back to the Sudan issues, Sudan is now an independent issue and we know that what happens in Sudan is different then what's happening in Nigeria. Africa, in today's terms, is no longer an unified 'other' but a continent which various issues in various regions are almost as diverse as European issues.
Thus, my comment on Asia should be examined. Asia might be different because, in one sense, it is still very foreign. Their culture still requires study to be understood. They are, in many respects, an other- in the western business world, an other in the arts/entertainment world, and an other in the technology field. They are an other, but a familiar other, one we can, at least, dissect, examine, and interpret. What I called 'the other' wasn't Japan or Asia, but that feeling of them being foreign in their separate arenas (like those I just mentioned). That feeling, of this being an other-than-my-own-reality brought me comfort at times this week, and what compelled me to feel a longing to which I shared here.
Undoubtedly there is an other in all our lives that would make us feel comfortable if we were there, visiting. However, this other reality in our lives is a fantasy that, while we might have experienced in the first person, is still a fantasy (in its worldliness) and therefore that is why we might be prone to like it more than where we live today-- which is a place that just happens to strike us in the face everyday just to say,
There's still a whole lot to do. My last class, thesis, work, and such.
This Sunday, however, I'd like to put forward a thought for you all to digest...
The other day I put forward a very personal perspective on 'the other' concept. Lately I've been thinking that I made generalizations about you and how you think about the other. Our reality today is that the world is very open and that a majority of us know issues outside of our immediate surroundings... and additionally, some of us actually care passionately about issues that do not immediately affect us. Take the matters of Sudan-- A country just under Egypt, whose environment is just as hard as fighting for survival, has come to the forefront of many of our minds. What happens there and what actions the government of Sudan make on its people effects how we behave here, even though a raid on the Sudanese isn't a raid on us physically. It wasn't long ago that Africa was just a continent in our minds. It was a whole, undivided, and issues (some of us thought) were universal issues. Take the generalization of Africa's environment, one could ask a person in 1940 (before the African campaign in WWII) about Africa's environment and they might tell you (again a generalization perhaps) that all of Africa is a desert. We know now (as pop culture in fact) that the Congo is mostly jungle, that South Africa is actually more towards the south pole and that effects cooler weather there, and that Libia has more of a Mediterranean feel. This example shows our globalized view (through education) and proves that our view of 'the other' isn't what it was a decade ago.
Back to the Sudan issues, Sudan is now an independent issue and we know that what happens in Sudan is different then what's happening in Nigeria. Africa, in today's terms, is no longer an unified 'other' but a continent which various issues in various regions are almost as diverse as European issues.
Thus, my comment on Asia should be examined. Asia might be different because, in one sense, it is still very foreign. Their culture still requires study to be understood. They are, in many respects, an other- in the western business world, an other in the arts/entertainment world, and an other in the technology field. They are an other, but a familiar other, one we can, at least, dissect, examine, and interpret. What I called 'the other' wasn't Japan or Asia, but that feeling of them being foreign in their separate arenas (like those I just mentioned). That feeling, of this being an other-than-my-own-reality brought me comfort at times this week, and what compelled me to feel a longing to which I shared here.
Undoubtedly there is an other in all our lives that would make us feel comfortable if we were there, visiting. However, this other reality in our lives is a fantasy that, while we might have experienced in the first person, is still a fantasy (in its worldliness) and therefore that is why we might be prone to like it more than where we live today-- which is a place that just happens to strike us in the face everyday just to say,
"hello you, I'm here-- acknowledge me"
Today, I think a measured dose of both the other in our lives, and the reality we face gives us balance. Without our experiences we would never grow in our knowledge, never have a fantasy to fantasize, never think about what lies beyond the fence. At the same time we should not push away all we have invested here in our own current reality. Our invested time, treasure, and passion; the words we speak, however insignificant at times, was genuine in that moment. To remember only the bad times and bad feelings gives us markers to which to consider change through that experience. Likewise, to only think of the happy times brings us hope and makes our lives livable. Both are necessary actions and do not conflict since they are both common things we do with our experiences.
What we should take home is what I once heard was the best answer to the meaning of life, "The meaning of life is to give life meaning"-- I would only add to that, "and to find love in that meaning."
Pontificate on that and steer your life to this:
live on and prosper;
be strong, passionate, and informed;
love without regret; and...
feel to know you're alive.
~J out
What we should take home is what I once heard was the best answer to the meaning of life, "The meaning of life is to give life meaning"-- I would only add to that, "and to find love in that meaning."
Pontificate on that and steer your life to this:
live on and prosper;
be strong, passionate, and informed;
love without regret; and...
feel to know you're alive.
~J out
Saturday, October 20, 2007
New Phone! :P
You got it right... I just bought a new phone.. here it is:
Isn't it cool looking? Well I think so...
Thin, but not absolutely paper thin. The razors are ok, but they are too wide and the krzr just didn't turn me on.. This one, oddly, really seems like a decent mobile phone for me. (And probably only me)
What I really liked:
Flip phone- I was between whether I liked the slide phone or the flip. With the flip.. the phone only needs to keep a small screen lit, but with a slide phone every button bump turns the whole screen on which could drain juice quick.
Light weight: Not having a heavy brick (like in Japan) to lug is always a "+"
Camera View: In Japan I loved that when you took a 'me' shot or a 'me and you' shot you could view yourself before you took it by swinging the top part around... Well phones here are getting there, but that little screen (when closed) turns into a view finder so that you can see yourself + somebody else. Big + (cuz the newer phones just have a dorky mirror ;P)
Music Player: Plays the typical set of music formats Mp3, AAC, and WMA, but it also has...
Expandable Memory (MicroSD): Yeah it can take microSD cards which you could load up with songs, pics, etc. and play them back.. Up to 2 gb's worth. Yeaaaah.
Groovy Camera: 1.3 mega pix might seem ok, but its hell of a lot better then the old cameras we used to use.
FM radio: NPR on my phone.. need I say more? k 94/7, 101.1, Kboo, and 105.5 the buzz (4Tink :)
So I'm happy, not 'bout the 2 yr contract I signed up for, but happy that I'm connected and it's on my dime (every month). Responsibility in doses...
Building my credit up for when I really need good credit.
The best part was that it was a total industry marketing advertisement invoked impulse buy. So I tip my hat off to you T-Mobile, to you Nokia, and to the millions of marketing Zhars who work to get my bottom dollar. Not my whole bottom dollar.. I did get a massive discount bringing the steep $169 price down to $50 bucks, which was sweet, but the irony is even sweeter..
*big thought warning*
-You see I just bought a phone from T-Mobile Inc. with money I earned (hourly) from my company RuleSpace LLC.
-RuleSpace just happens to be contracted out by T-Mobile to build their mobile parental controls which I am specifically grading content for.
-So the $50 started with T-Mobile's contract- which flowed through Rulespace- into my pocket -and then back to a T-Mobile box store...
Ahhh Trickle down... Ronald Regan would be proud don't you think?
If you want to learn more then check out Canada's Nokia 6133 website (b/c the Canada site totally rocks the American T-Mobile site!)
http://pushtostart.ca
~J out
Isn't it cool looking? Well I think so...
Thin, but not absolutely paper thin. The razors are ok, but they are too wide and the krzr just didn't turn me on.. This one, oddly, really seems like a decent mobile phone for me. (And probably only me)
What I really liked:
Flip phone- I was between whether I liked the slide phone or the flip. With the flip.. the phone only needs to keep a small screen lit, but with a slide phone every button bump turns the whole screen on which could drain juice quick.
Light weight: Not having a heavy brick (like in Japan) to lug is always a "+"
Camera View: In Japan I loved that when you took a 'me' shot or a 'me and you' shot you could view yourself before you took it by swinging the top part around... Well phones here are getting there, but that little screen (when closed) turns into a view finder so that you can see yourself + somebody else. Big + (cuz the newer phones just have a dorky mirror ;P)
Music Player: Plays the typical set of music formats Mp3, AAC, and WMA, but it also has...
Expandable Memory (MicroSD): Yeah it can take microSD cards which you could load up with songs, pics, etc. and play them back.. Up to 2 gb's worth. Yeaaaah.
Groovy Camera: 1.3 mega pix might seem ok, but its hell of a lot better then the old cameras we used to use.
FM radio: NPR on my phone.. need I say more? k 94/7, 101.1, Kboo, and 105.5 the buzz (4Tink :)
So I'm happy, not 'bout the 2 yr contract I signed up for, but happy that I'm connected and it's on my dime (every month). Responsibility in doses...
Building my credit up for when I really need good credit.
The best part was that it was a total industry marketing advertisement invoked impulse buy. So I tip my hat off to you T-Mobile, to you Nokia, and to the millions of marketing Zhars who work to get my bottom dollar. Not my whole bottom dollar.. I did get a massive discount bringing the steep $169 price down to $50 bucks, which was sweet, but the irony is even sweeter..
*big thought warning*
-You see I just bought a phone from T-Mobile Inc. with money I earned (hourly) from my company RuleSpace LLC.
-RuleSpace just happens to be contracted out by T-Mobile to build their mobile parental controls which I am specifically grading content for.
-So the $50 started with T-Mobile's contract- which flowed through Rulespace- into my pocket -and then back to a T-Mobile box store...
Ahhh Trickle down... Ronald Regan would be proud don't you think?
If you want to learn more then check out Canada's Nokia 6133 website (b/c the Canada site totally rocks the American T-Mobile site!)
http://pushtostart.ca
~J out
Friday, October 19, 2007
The absence of the other
When us East Asian Studies people study Asia and the reaction of the west to Asia, the concept of "the other" or the mysteriousness of another culture always gets used to describe something we're not familiar with. The other is so foreign that sometimes we prefer it to our own drab reality. Sometimes we fantasize it, and for those who have been there, we sometimes wish we were there even if when we were there we constantly complained about it being too foreign.
So far I've been back for a year and things, while I was only gone for a couple of months, have changed. People I thought I knew to my core have changed to people I may or may not know now and people who knew me tell me that I'm different. What does it all mean? Its effect is that we estrange each other like we were in quarantine until they go through the familiar motions we associated them to be before they left.
Not for me, however, I haven't converted back to the person I left before I went to Japan. I go, daily, through the motions that I went through when I was there. From checking email, to blogging, etc. and while I no longer long to be home (since I'm here) the motions I do perhaps is what keeps those I knew well from embracing who I am now. Perhaps if I was still there and kept doing what I did there and what I do now (the motions) perhaps I'd still have that bond with people who desired to stay in touch with me while I was there.
Work somehow adds to the mix in that is also keeps who I used to be from coming back. I thought who I am now was who I used to be, but perhaps I'm not..
It's hard being green... ~Mr. Kermit't'Frog
~J
So far I've been back for a year and things, while I was only gone for a couple of months, have changed. People I thought I knew to my core have changed to people I may or may not know now and people who knew me tell me that I'm different. What does it all mean? Its effect is that we estrange each other like we were in quarantine until they go through the familiar motions we associated them to be before they left.
Not for me, however, I haven't converted back to the person I left before I went to Japan. I go, daily, through the motions that I went through when I was there. From checking email, to blogging, etc. and while I no longer long to be home (since I'm here) the motions I do perhaps is what keeps those I knew well from embracing who I am now. Perhaps if I was still there and kept doing what I did there and what I do now (the motions) perhaps I'd still have that bond with people who desired to stay in touch with me while I was there.
Work somehow adds to the mix in that is also keeps who I used to be from coming back. I thought who I am now was who I used to be, but perhaps I'm not..
It's hard being green... ~Mr. Kermit't'Frog
~J
Thursday, October 18, 2007
Today I got an upgrade of sorts.. An upgrade of duties, responsibilities, and mental anguish perhaps. The upgrade kinda means a lot to me only because it's kinda like I proved myself to people who hired me for what I said I could do, then watched me work for 8 months, and now want to give me more stuff to do... like issuing more trust.
Today I called my girlfriend to try and explain just what happened. I got into details which would put even the most avid 'joshie' to bore. What I really meant to say was that why this isn't some amazing financial buy a Porshe upgrade, it's exciting because A.) I'm doing something else and B.) Somebody in the office (i.e. my boss) wants me to stick around longer.
Whoa. I mean this month hasn't been fantastic for me. I've kinda been down on myself and haven't had any real 'good things' happen to make me feel like I'm not... [insert bad thing].
So-- good for me!... I guess.
I'm glad I could impress somebody with my skills these past months.. I just hope things get better from here.
Here's to success!~ from where ever you can get it in life *< ;-P
Cheers
~J out
Today I called my girlfriend to try and explain just what happened. I got into details which would put even the most avid 'joshie' to bore. What I really meant to say was that why this isn't some amazing financial buy a Porshe upgrade, it's exciting because A.) I'm doing something else and B.) Somebody in the office (i.e. my boss) wants me to stick around longer.
Whoa. I mean this month hasn't been fantastic for me. I've kinda been down on myself and haven't had any real 'good things' happen to make me feel like I'm not... [insert bad thing].
So-- good for me!... I guess.
I'm glad I could impress somebody with my skills these past months.. I just hope things get better from here.
Here's to success!~ from where ever you can get it in life *< ;-P
Cheers
~J out
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
That Baroque Sound
Take a break from the popular culture sounds of rock, alt. rock, rap, hip-hop, classic rock, and all that other music and talk.. Now sit back and turn on a playlist of Baroque Classical music and listen to it...
10 minutes will give you clarity, 30 minutes will refresh your mind, an hour will give you back critical thinking skills... 2 hours and 45 minutes will compel you to post on your blog about listening to Baroque Classical music :) (and make you start talking like a good 'ole chap)
Baroque: The melodic gen sing for your mind that's good for struggling students who are working on papers & reports this time of year.
~J
10 minutes will give you clarity, 30 minutes will refresh your mind, an hour will give you back critical thinking skills... 2 hours and 45 minutes will compel you to post on your blog about listening to Baroque Classical music :) (and make you start talking like a good 'ole chap)
Baroque: The melodic gen sing for your mind that's good for struggling students who are working on papers & reports this time of year.
~J
Car Funk
I don't know if my Subbie is telling me that it's tired of my long commute or what, but it's been acting weird with overheating issues...
*sigh I hope it just doesn't give up on me... it has been a fine car....
~J out
*sigh I hope it just doesn't give up on me... it has been a fine car....
~J out
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Settling the sand
There's too many analogies to what life is like, but never enough on the impact of what we do in our lives... so here's one.
Through life we pass through stages like walking on sand. One action causes a foot print that no matter how much you try, others can follow it to the source. We mess up and many times leave foot prints where we should not have been. Likewise we follow paths and think that, at times, our actions are true when they're actually misguided and our prints always reflects that.
Judgment, as we see fit, is always with its own footprint and those administering it should know that their footprints are also in life's proverbial sandbox.
Don't lie to yourself, truth can dispel lies, but it also causes personal and public pain sometimes. The stinging of some truths will continue to sting for a while until those of us who have been stung, by our own stinging and/or the stinging of others, can make amends with ourselves.
We are not soulless machines who are capable of rebooting, we're human beings and cannot live without each other. Sometimes what we feel we have lost is not entirely lost, but misplaced. With deep thought anyone of us can clime onto a bicycle and ride on... even though we have forgotten what it was like to ride a bike.
It is a fact of life that our looming predictions, seeds of discontent, and secrets only scatter those who just want to embrace in true companionship. There are humbled, humiliated, lost, love one's who are doing nothing but waiting for the warm embrace of their companions to find them and tell them they care. If all of us could just embrace those we love whole heartedly, and not let go, then time will settle any debt we have, on its own, and the roots of love, forgiveness, and happiness will blossem and hopefully make us better loving people.
~J
Through life we pass through stages like walking on sand. One action causes a foot print that no matter how much you try, others can follow it to the source. We mess up and many times leave foot prints where we should not have been. Likewise we follow paths and think that, at times, our actions are true when they're actually misguided and our prints always reflects that.
Judgment, as we see fit, is always with its own footprint and those administering it should know that their footprints are also in life's proverbial sandbox.
Don't lie to yourself, truth can dispel lies, but it also causes personal and public pain sometimes. The stinging of some truths will continue to sting for a while until those of us who have been stung, by our own stinging and/or the stinging of others, can make amends with ourselves.
We are not soulless machines who are capable of rebooting, we're human beings and cannot live without each other. Sometimes what we feel we have lost is not entirely lost, but misplaced. With deep thought anyone of us can clime onto a bicycle and ride on... even though we have forgotten what it was like to ride a bike.
It is a fact of life that our looming predictions, seeds of discontent, and secrets only scatter those who just want to embrace in true companionship. There are humbled, humiliated, lost, love one's who are doing nothing but waiting for the warm embrace of their companions to find them and tell them they care. If all of us could just embrace those we love whole heartedly, and not let go, then time will settle any debt we have, on its own, and the roots of love, forgiveness, and happiness will blossem and hopefully make us better loving people.
~J
Thursday, October 11, 2007
A cause not worthy enough
Comments from an under 30 yr old:
You'd think that the youth of America would be throwing the country into an all out revolution with all the crud going on, right? There's more than enough causes to stand and fight for, but I believe this "inaction" is merely the result of a 'good cause overload.'
Today, in the United States, is Natl. Coming out day, Gay day, Jendaa Free Nichi (JP), or whatever. Why it is in October during the raining season, I'll never understand. What I do understand is that the message is for young people to accept that gender norms are a form of restriction on freedom. I have to beg the question of those who ask of me to acknowledge the legitimacy of homosexual and transsexual behavior,
"Is it that gender is imposed on me, like slavery by society, to be a masculine heterosexual male, or is that you are imposing on me your belief to accept that your view and orientation must be accepted as normal behavior for the 21st century, by me?"
I'll pose it another way...
To the normal folks who joke with friends, fall in love, and kid around.. A boy is a boy and girls fall in love with boys and boys chase girls around (and act like total doofs doing it), am I right?
That's the norm 'round here. It's the norm in high school and in college. However, the issues of gender bending have, without a doubt, been imposed on us and we're forced to either accept them as normal behaviors or recede to being anti-gay. Haa haa ha.. what a joke.. Anti-gay? Is that what people who don't get their way result to calling those who don't buy in? Oh I'll just call you a name like homophobic and you'll feel some guilt and cross over to a gay loving dude... please~
Here's the revelation folks... Our generation doesn't want conflict. You wanna be weird? Go ahead. You'll be treated weird and if that's ok then ok.
We don't want to fight that hard,
raise too much hell,
Or sit in a prison (with basic cable) for protesting,
or get busted for smoking joints.
We are a non-serious-conflict prone group who chat online...
If you step out of line or out of sync-- you know what you'll get out of us?
"Dude.. not cool"
or
"Well whatever... so I heard about....."
That's the difference in our generation. To y'all (freaking out conservative folks) some of us don't agree with the whole Gay thing or gender bending thing, but we're not about to get all up in someone's face about it... because it's not cool. We let a dude shoot up Ohio, because letting him be his own thing, roll'n his own way... that's our style-- flawed, but free.
Society is a ying and yang relationship in constant balance. In the 60's you saw a forceful over abundance of yang being thrown down on the youth which, naturally, forced a greater amount of ying from the youth to balance it back... worlds collided~
In this new world and new century we've learned that if you keep them relatively balanced-- ying & yang-- your %age of backlash drops significantly. Ya gett'n it yet?
So parents-- when you see your kid, my age, plopped down in front of a computer, ipod, T.V., or handheld gameboy-- be somewhat thankful that you're not getting that phone call to bail them out of jail for busting the windows out of a government building or anything like that...
Be free, Be Cultured, Be informed, Be active, Be yourself...
~J out
You'd think that the youth of America would be throwing the country into an all out revolution with all the crud going on, right? There's more than enough causes to stand and fight for, but I believe this "inaction" is merely the result of a 'good cause overload.'
Today, in the United States, is Natl. Coming out day, Gay day, Jendaa Free Nichi (JP), or whatever. Why it is in October during the raining season, I'll never understand. What I do understand is that the message is for young people to accept that gender norms are a form of restriction on freedom. I have to beg the question of those who ask of me to acknowledge the legitimacy of homosexual and transsexual behavior,
"Is it that gender is imposed on me, like slavery by society, to be a masculine heterosexual male, or is that you are imposing on me your belief to accept that your view and orientation must be accepted as normal behavior for the 21st century, by me?"
I'll pose it another way...
To the normal folks who joke with friends, fall in love, and kid around.. A boy is a boy and girls fall in love with boys and boys chase girls around (and act like total doofs doing it), am I right?
That's the norm 'round here. It's the norm in high school and in college. However, the issues of gender bending have, without a doubt, been imposed on us and we're forced to either accept them as normal behaviors or recede to being anti-gay. Haa haa ha.. what a joke.. Anti-gay? Is that what people who don't get their way result to calling those who don't buy in? Oh I'll just call you a name like homophobic and you'll feel some guilt and cross over to a gay loving dude... please~
Here's the revelation folks... Our generation doesn't want conflict. You wanna be weird? Go ahead. You'll be treated weird and if that's ok then ok.
We don't want to fight that hard,
raise too much hell,
Or sit in a prison (with basic cable) for protesting,
or get busted for smoking joints.
We are a non-serious-conflict prone group who chat online...
If you step out of line or out of sync-- you know what you'll get out of us?
"Dude.. not cool"
or
"Well whatever... so I heard about....."
That's the difference in our generation. To y'all (freaking out conservative folks) some of us don't agree with the whole Gay thing or gender bending thing, but we're not about to get all up in someone's face about it... because it's not cool. We let a dude shoot up Ohio, because letting him be his own thing, roll'n his own way... that's our style-- flawed, but free.
Society is a ying and yang relationship in constant balance. In the 60's you saw a forceful over abundance of yang being thrown down on the youth which, naturally, forced a greater amount of ying from the youth to balance it back... worlds collided~
In this new world and new century we've learned that if you keep them relatively balanced-- ying & yang-- your %age of backlash drops significantly. Ya gett'n it yet?
So parents-- when you see your kid, my age, plopped down in front of a computer, ipod, T.V., or handheld gameboy-- be somewhat thankful that you're not getting that phone call to bail them out of jail for busting the windows out of a government building or anything like that...
Be free, Be Cultured, Be informed, Be active, Be yourself...
~J out
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Back 2 Norml
Luckily Radiohead came to save the day with their new album 'in rainbow.' The album features an unique aeclectic Radiohead sound that you can't really find anywhere else. The news about is that they're distributing it via, and only via, the web. After googling "Radiohead" or "Radiohead in ranbows" and getting to their site, it takes about 10 or less minutes to pick your price (yes you choose how much to pay. Be it 0.00 pounds or 10 quid) registering and then submitting your info. A link then shows up and the file (a .zip) pops up like you would download any thing.
I enjoy the sounds of Radiohead, but I don't enjoy the ignorance of my peers. A twist, if you may, in the conversation-- News, as I thought, was all around us. Like a plague or privy to have it whirl about you and to always be 'in the know.' I am a news hound- I have my nose in every scandal, election prediction, War assessment, Legal battle, and international headlines. Yet, that's just me.. And I don't expect anyone but me to be that way. However I found it shocking that my peers in class and at work are clueless and must live under some rock their entire lives. For example, someone I knew asked if it had rained today-- I said, "yeah this afternoon I think, but did you see that giant swirl off the coast?" "Oh" they replied, "I don't look at weather reports..." Now this comes from a person, like most of us, who spends time at their computer for hours and they don't know that a massive swirling weather system was just off our coast? Do they not know of 'the danger zone?'
You don't have to know a lot to live, but at the very least you must have a eye out for when the apocalypse rains down on your area so that you could, at the least, take out your umbrella. God and man have made it possible to know what is happening at a Summit in Karachi from a beach chair in Bangkok- Ponder that folks--- the 60's had a famous phrase they said before going to commercial breaks "Stay Tuned Folks..."
Don't be caught being those people who focus so intently on their immediate surroundings that they don't know if they're indeed in "The Danger Zone" or when the President declares Marshall Law and forbodes you to use your cell phone in a crowded bus (ok maybe that would be a little extreme, but you get the point)
Stay Tuned folks-and the world, you thought you knew, will change dramatically before your eyes.
~J
I enjoy the sounds of Radiohead, but I don't enjoy the ignorance of my peers. A twist, if you may, in the conversation-- News, as I thought, was all around us. Like a plague or privy to have it whirl about you and to always be 'in the know.' I am a news hound- I have my nose in every scandal, election prediction, War assessment, Legal battle, and international headlines. Yet, that's just me.. And I don't expect anyone but me to be that way. However I found it shocking that my peers in class and at work are clueless and must live under some rock their entire lives. For example, someone I knew asked if it had rained today-- I said, "yeah this afternoon I think, but did you see that giant swirl off the coast?" "Oh" they replied, "I don't look at weather reports..." Now this comes from a person, like most of us, who spends time at their computer for hours and they don't know that a massive swirling weather system was just off our coast? Do they not know of 'the danger zone?'
You don't have to know a lot to live, but at the very least you must have a eye out for when the apocalypse rains down on your area so that you could, at the least, take out your umbrella. God and man have made it possible to know what is happening at a Summit in Karachi from a beach chair in Bangkok- Ponder that folks--- the 60's had a famous phrase they said before going to commercial breaks "Stay Tuned Folks..."
Don't be caught being those people who focus so intently on their immediate surroundings that they don't know if they're indeed in "The Danger Zone" or when the President declares Marshall Law and forbodes you to use your cell phone in a crowded bus (ok maybe that would be a little extreme, but you get the point)
Stay Tuned folks-and the world, you thought you knew, will change dramatically before your eyes.
GO Benazir Bhutto!!! YOU SHOW THEM GIRL!
~J
Monday, October 08, 2007
My New Fav. Band
This band I spotted while checking out a cd shop in Sapporo. Their new album was released while I was over there, but because I wasn't totally into it then (and their album was spendy) I didn't get it. I regret not buying it, and I'm still out there looking on ebay for their albums. They're the Yoshida Brothers... They've made a twist on the old sounds of Japan by turning shamisen music into groovy rock style. It'd be like rocking out on a banjo here in the US.
Anyway.. After seeing their music featured on the Wii Ad I thought I'd give them a shout out on my ole blog:
Take it away~
~J out
Anyway.. After seeing their music featured on the Wii Ad I thought I'd give them a shout out on my ole blog:
Take it away~
~J out
Sunday, October 07, 2007
Think Happy Thoughts
Much have I been in meditation these hours. Searching for answers when condemning myself for the sins I have enacted on this planet. How can one boy steeped in honor for his accomplishments, for sticking in college till the bitter end, and whose friends and colleagues respect, dive into a world of sin that pours nothing but vanity and guilt upon his life and the lives of those precious few who trusted him? What madness has befallen this hero society has lifted up and called it's future? Where does the happy thoughts spring from his diluted picture of reality and pleasure?
Deep thoughts penetrate my young, untrained, novice mind. From my pit I cannot dive further, only upwards can I fly... and it is perhaps that only truth that will allow me to escape my self-destructive prison. I must remain humble and vow to keep myself alive and full of vigor. Humans, such as I, have had nothing but hardships to traverse and to give into the easiest of emotions would signal just how truly weak I've become.
The skies, though dampened by rain, are above me. I must lift myself in the ways prescribed by Christ and not be a hypocrite by loving others and not loving myself. It is the ego we all face, too much makes us drunk on our own selves; too little leaves us dehydrated and weak to face the next day of struggle.
A fall from grace leaves but one path the fallen must take. Upwards bound I must go if ever to restore such public credit that I currently have much debt of.
So rise up, I shall, meet the rain soaked day of tomorrow and with my battered self I will train myself to fly once more with the eagles who soar above me waiting for my return.
From a reflective, yet humble and optimistic soul.
~J out
Deep thoughts penetrate my young, untrained, novice mind. From my pit I cannot dive further, only upwards can I fly... and it is perhaps that only truth that will allow me to escape my self-destructive prison. I must remain humble and vow to keep myself alive and full of vigor. Humans, such as I, have had nothing but hardships to traverse and to give into the easiest of emotions would signal just how truly weak I've become.
The skies, though dampened by rain, are above me. I must lift myself in the ways prescribed by Christ and not be a hypocrite by loving others and not loving myself. It is the ego we all face, too much makes us drunk on our own selves; too little leaves us dehydrated and weak to face the next day of struggle.
A fall from grace leaves but one path the fallen must take. Upwards bound I must go if ever to restore such public credit that I currently have much debt of.
So rise up, I shall, meet the rain soaked day of tomorrow and with my battered self I will train myself to fly once more with the eagles who soar above me waiting for my return.
From a reflective, yet humble and optimistic soul.
~J out
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
Atarashi Ame
New Rain... It's almost been ages since I've seen the drizzle of rain pour over my wind shield. I like it... it's refreshing and reminding of where we are. It brings the rivers back and the lawns. Rain is good...
So on to my thesis. What on Earth is worth spilling hours of research to write something worthy of a Lewis and Clark essay? That's what it boils down to. For at least two years I've managed to stay in and stay involved as a LC student, but this is what codifies it. There's two battles you fight that's worth anything in college. The one to get in and the one to get out (with something in your teeth). Walking out means I got to pull something together that is worth the time to write and worth the time read. LC knows that whatever I produce and is stamped by them is what LC stands for. Their credibility comes down to the 35-40 pages of concise critical thinking.
First I was the one boasting, now it seems everybody has it harder then me.. "just BS the middle" they say, but they don't get it. There's one paper which is the last battle of college that absolutely doesn't get BS'd. To all sophomores, freshmen, etc. know this... learn it and learn it well. 4 year rich highly acclaimed schools will let you off the hook in many of the their classes and final projects. You can go ahead and do it the night before, BS it all, whatever... But not the capstone of your education... This one they watch... They read it-- And once approved-- their credibility lies in the students own hands.
Make it good lad.... We're all counting for a paper we can stand on with pride.
~J out
So on to my thesis. What on Earth is worth spilling hours of research to write something worthy of a Lewis and Clark essay? That's what it boils down to. For at least two years I've managed to stay in and stay involved as a LC student, but this is what codifies it. There's two battles you fight that's worth anything in college. The one to get in and the one to get out (with something in your teeth). Walking out means I got to pull something together that is worth the time to write and worth the time read. LC knows that whatever I produce and is stamped by them is what LC stands for. Their credibility comes down to the 35-40 pages of concise critical thinking.
First I was the one boasting, now it seems everybody has it harder then me.. "just BS the middle" they say, but they don't get it. There's one paper which is the last battle of college that absolutely doesn't get BS'd. To all sophomores, freshmen, etc. know this... learn it and learn it well. 4 year rich highly acclaimed schools will let you off the hook in many of the their classes and final projects. You can go ahead and do it the night before, BS it all, whatever... But not the capstone of your education... This one they watch... They read it-- And once approved-- their credibility lies in the students own hands.
Make it good lad.... We're all counting for a paper we can stand on with pride.
~J out
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